jinx

Remember in elementary school when two people would simultaneously say the same word or phrase? What ensued was a race to yell “Jinx!” first to be the Jinxer and not the Jinxee. This silly game was very popular in our school cafeteria back in the day. There are a bajillion rules, variations, and penalties, but the idea remains: a jinx is bad luck.

Unless of course, you don’t believe in luck. Most days, I would say I don’t believe in luck. But this week and the events that have occurred have made me rethink luck. Jinxes have sprinkled my past week. 
Friday morning, I woke up excited to see one of my friends who was driving many, many miles to spend the weekend with me. But I said to myself, “I bet he doesn’t come.” Jinx.
After a series of unfortunate, unavoidable events, this friend was unable to come visit me. I’m sad, yes, but mostly I’m mad that I jinxed myself. 
Earlier in the week, while holding a bucket for a retching elderly woman, I said to myself, “I can’t remember the last time I vomited.” Jinx.
Friday night was the first and last time I shall eat brussel sprouts. Let’s just say brussel sprouts and hamburger do not taste as good the second time around. Laying on the cold bathroom floor, I thought, “This is so not ideal! Why did I have to jinx myself!?”

Luck is not something I talk about. To talk about luck makes me sound like I have no faith in a sovereign God. But during weeks like the last, where it seems I may have the gift of prophecy, or just simply bad luck, I start to talk about luck. I start to believe that I can actually jinx myself. And I start to believe that by my words alone, I can control future events. So the past two days, I’ve refrained from saying much of anything. I don’t want to be optimistic and plan ahead, in case I jinx myself. But I don’t want to think negative things aloud, in case I jinx myself.

But today, I realized how ridiculous this all is. I believe in Someone who has all authority and dominion over the powers of this world. My words cannot control future events. I do not have good luck. I have determination and perseverance. I do not have bad luck. I have cause and effect. All those sayings about life handing you lemons or being a hand of cards are somewhat true. I can’t determine my circumstances, but I can decide my responses.

So enough of jinxes and luck. Enough of pity parties and moping. Enough of fearing my own words.

Today is a good day. And it holds much possibility and potential. 

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