I love life. I mean, I really love this life. I was eating a Dove chocolate the other day, and the little message on the inside of the wrapper said “Enjoy the little pleasures life gives you.” So I did. I took a run, made a grilled cheese sandwich, drank a tall glass of cold skim milk, and watched Dan in Real Life in my zebra snuggie. That was a good afternoon.
But these last few days have made me question whether or not this life is that great. And I don’t mean life as in me breathing in and out…I mean life as a nursing student. Class from 8 to 5 in the same room of 80 students, staring at a computer screen, with no windows has been torture. The workload has been intimidating and exhausting. Every morning, as I open that computer screen, I ask myself, “Why am I doing this?” The answer, of course is, “Hilary, you’re a 5th semester student, you’ve already completed your graduation application and you’re way too many thousands of dollars in debt to change majors. So suck it up.”
It seems so easy to live pessimistically. To find the bad, the ugly, and the annoying in every little aspect of life. It’s real easy for me to hear the chomping of ice two rows ahead of me. It’s real easy to find the one sidewalk on campus not shoveled adequately. And it’s real easy to count every page of homework that has to be read by tomorrow.
But it’s hard to choose a positive attitude. It’s hard to smile in the midst of writing a 2 post-it long “to-do list”. It’s hard to see the sun when the -20 degree wind chill is freezing your snot into icicles hanging from your nose.
I want to be a positive person. I want to wear out this gift of life. And I want to be abandoned to my King. All of these things don’t happen overnight. It’s the day in and day out, little choices consistently made that shape a person’s character. So tonight, I’m gonna put down my textbook, and pick up a fun novel. I’m going to make myself a cup of green tea and put on my snuggie. And tomorrow morning, I’m going to go start my roommate’s car 15 min before leaving for class. And I’m going to take my vitamins and eat a good breakfast and spend alone time with the One who conquered death and the grave to win my heart.
Because God gave me this life. And He gave me tater tot casserole, and pink nail polish, and 4 beautiful nieces. He gave me smoothies, Choco Latte, and a child from India to sponsor. And He gave me family, friends, and pandora radio. And God gave me peanut butter, a heart for missions, and the ability to learn.
God gives real good gifts.
And so…I love these gifts and I love this life, but most of all, I love my God.